Of Fools and Idiosyncracies
by blissbubbles
Summary: RoyEd. Don't like, don't read. just a little scene in Roy's office. XD


Edward Elric marched into the Colonel's office with the usual scowl on his face whenever he entered the said room. He treaded his way towards the Colonel hoping his report would be a quick one, sparing him horrible moments with the renowned Flame Alchemist.

He tried to call Roy's attention by coughing but he wasn't even spared a glance. Deciding the Colonel was engaged in a serious matter, he patiently waited for him to notice he was actually there. After standing there for what seemed like eternity, a vein popped in his head as he tried to force out his words, "Colonel Mustang, sir".

The Colonel raised his head and stared at him. _Good. Now we can have this over with and I can finally go._

"Fullmetal," he said in quite a surprised tone, or at least that's what it seemed to be. "I didn't notice you were there," Roy continued as he set his pen down and leaned back on his chair, "must be because of the pile of papers in my desk."

Edward settled with glaring at him instead of retaliating. "It's not my fault you've got such poor eyesight, _Colonel_." Roy was about to say something but Ed stopped him by handing over his report. "Here. I didn't mess up this time, if that's what you're thinking."

Mustang browsed his report without any interest at all, not that he minded it. With a final salute, he was ready to leave the Colonel in peace. _Finally._ He turned his back and headed for the door. "And where do you think you're going?"

"Out, where else?" he said with a tone of sarcasm in his voice. Roy, unperturbed by his tone continued his being a sadist. "Well, you can't. You still have work to do."

He glared. And glared. And glared even more before he decided to do whatever that bastard wants or rather _demands_ of him to do. "Well then, what is it? I don't have all day," he said quite irritably.

"Quite in a hurry now, aren't we? Hmmm. You don't happen to have a date now, do you?" The Colonel's teasing tone and amused smile really got on his nerves. And he sent him one of his best glares yet again. One more word from him and he'll surely master the art of glaring. Damn him.

Roy was having a hard time trying not to laugh at his subordinate's actions. "Well, anyway, there's a new mission waiting for you. But before that, you need to gather all related information regarding it."

"Is that all? Then can I go now? I still need to gather _information_ as you said so yourself," he said non-matter-of-factly.

"No, you still can't. I've asked for the books you're going to need and you're perfectly staying in _here_, Fullmetal," Roy continued, completely ignoring the fact that Ed was glaring daggers at him. "And that's an order."

With a final glare, Ed stomped his way to the said books and settled in the couch as he started reading whatever the bastard told him to.

Seeing that he won the unofficial Roy vs. Edward match yet again, Roy continued with his paperwork he was doing a while ago, perfectly satisfied with himself.

A couple of hours passed and not a word was said between the two. Roy decided to offer a snack to make up for his being a bastard a while ago. "Hey, I'm taking a bite at the cafeteria, do you want anything?"

No reply.

_Sheesh. I didn't think he would be that angry._ He approached Edward who was still buried in his book. "Hey…," and found him sleeping. Sweat drop. _Was he sleeping all this time? And I thought he was purposely ignoring me. Not that I'm not used to it._

Roy positioned himself beside the sleeping boy and removed the book Edward was still holding on until now. Edward stirred at the lost of contact with his precious book. Roy froze. _Hell. It's not like I'm doing something wrong… _His thoughts trailed as he was caught off guard by the peaceful look on the younger boy's face. _Totally different when he's fighting… or when I'm around him. Sigh. Why do I even bother…?_

_He really looks cute when he's sleeping. Oh, hell. Where on earth did that came from?_ Roy shrugged his thoughts off as he absent-mindedly brushed off a stray lock of blonde hair from the boy's face. _He could pass as a girl if he stops being a jerk. _

Roy continued studying Ed's soft features. _Heh. Totally feminine._ He traced his eyelashes which looked more like a doll's than a guy's lashes. He never noticed it before. It was always those golden orbs which captivated him. Roy finds it amusing how Ed would react to his simple touch. Not that he minded Ed waking up at all. He wouldn't mind being caught caressing another man's face, would he? _Shrug. Whatever._ He allowed his thumb to run a ghostly touch over Ed's lips. _Dry. Too dry. _With one last look at Ed's sleeping figure, he leaned down and locked his lips with the other guy's. It was a chaste kiss. After a while, he pulled away from the kiss but his face remained a few inches above Ed's. He found Ed's lips surprisingly soft…and sweet. _Hmm… Not bad. Not bad at all._

Ed woke up with the feeling of something moist in his lips. He opened his eyes and was rather shocked to see the Colonel's face looming over him.

Roy found himself staring at golden orbs which seem to glow up close. _Beautiful._ _Wait. Golden orbs? Fuck. He's awake. Dammit._

Ed was having a hard time hiding his amusement from seeing Roy's expression at being caught in such an awkward moment._ Heh._ _Payback time. _"Do you like me that much to molest me in my sleep, huh, _Colonel_?"

"I wasn't molesting you," Roy immediately shifted to defensive mode which amused Ed even more. "I was just…," and for once, the Colonel was at loss of words.

"Taking advantage of me," Ed finished his sentence for him. Roy blushed at Ed's straight-forwardness. It was only then that he realized that he was being made fun of. _Can't let him have all the fun now, can I? _Roy smirked inwardly. _If that's the way you want it, pretty boy._

"Well…," Roy trailed off as he continued to stare at the younger boy's face with complete seriousness. "You can't blame me for finding you… attractive," now it's Ed turn to blush and Roy was pleased with the effect of his assault. "Honestly, I find you prettier than most of the girls I went out with," Ed turned beet red at the comment. Their faces were only mere inches away from each other. Ed turned his head to one side to hide his embarrassment, "Stop being a jerk, bastard."

"I'm not being a jerk," Roy protested. "I'm just telling the truth."

"Liar," Ed insisted, still without looking at the Colonel.

"Now why would I lie to you?" he asked him innocently in return. _The bastard._

He answered him with a glare. He's not going to lose to Roy. Not now. Not ever.

"Say, Edward," Roy continued his assault ignoring Ed's glares. "Don't you find me attractive, too?"

"Don't flatter yourself, Colonel," he said without breaking his glare.

"How dishonest," Roy said with a shake of his head. "We wouldn't want that now, would we?"

"Just because _you_ find me attractive doesn't mean that I should find you attractive too," Ed snapped. "Now, _lay off._"

"Fine," Roy resigned. "If you say so…" he stood up and straightened his dress to leave.

"Where are you going?" Ed could feel his eyebrow raise up in curiosity.

Roy also raised an eyebrow in return. "Why do you care?"

"Who says I do?"

"Then why did you ask?"

"Forget it," Ed decided to just shrug it off. _Who cares about him, anyway? _"Just go."

The Colonel shrugged and took step forward then paused, "If you really want to know, I'm off to find a date." Ed stiffened. "Since I suppose you don't like me back."

_That's it! Just because I didn't say I liked him back he'll go looking for another? Well, fuck him. He can rot in hell for all I care! _"Suit yourself. Go find yourself a _girl_. Have fun, Colonel," his features has SARCASM and JEALOUSY written all over it. He reached for the book he was reading a while ago and pretended to drown himself in the texts.

Roy continued his way to the door and just before he went out he turned to Ed. "I'll be back in a couple of hours. Don't miss me too much."

The door was closed immediately before a book came in contact with it.

_Damn him._

After half an hour of reading, Ed got bored with the book and tossed it aside. He picked up another book which was worth reading. A few minutes later, the door opened and welcomed the Colonel in. Ed didn't need to look to see who it was.

"That was fast," he commented without turning away from his book. "Got dumped?"

"You hurt my pride, Fullmetal," Roy said seriously. "They chase me. I do the dumping."

"Still an ass as ever," Ed muttered under his breath.

"Besides," Roy continued ignoring the boy's comments. "I can't find anyone prettier than you."

"Oh, shut up," Ed was having a hard time fighting the blush that is slowly creeping into his face.

Roy made his way towards Ed who was still purposely ignoring him. Once he reached the couch, he knelt before him and looked at him in a very serious manner.

"Ed, I'm serious," he started. "I really do like you."

No reply.

"So what do you say…" he continued, even though Ed was still ignoring him. "Would you be mine?" he finished his proposal as he handed him a bouquet of red roses which seemed to come out of nowhere.

"I'm not a girl, Mustang," Ed retorted irritably, trying to hide his embarrassment behind the book.

Roy suddenly grabbed the book out of Ed's hands. "Hey! Give that back!" Okay, so now Ed's really pissed.

"You know me, Fullmetal," he said non-matter-of-factly. "I'm not known for ever giving up on something I really wanted."

"Tch. Don't be so full of yourself," he snorted. "What makes you think you can have me? Just because mmff---"

Ed found his mouth being tackled by the other man's. He tried to resist him but Roy was just too… determined.

"I won't… take no… for an answer, Fullmetal," Roy said in between his kisses. "I'm going… to have you… at all cost..."

"How can.. you even.. expect me.. to believe you… now, Mustang?" Roy stopped and stared at the boy below him in mere confusion.

"You went off searching for some women out there right after I rejected you and you expect me to believe you?" mockery was evident in Ed's voice. He's ranting but he didn't care. He's infuriated with Roy but he's even more furious with himself. "How low can you get?"

Roy remained unperturbed by Ed's words. "I was right. You were jealous, weren't you?"

"So what if I am!" Ed snapped. "Why do you care?"

Roy silenced him with another kiss. "You could have just told me you like me. I wouldn't be looking for others if you did."

"Bastard."

"So what do you say about my proposal?" Roy had yet to remind him.

Ed rolled his eyes. "Isn't it fucking obvious?"

Roy can't help an amused smile. "I want a proper answer."

"Stop being an asshole and kiss me, bastard," Ed said as he pulled Roy in for another kiss.

"I like you, too," Ed whispered in between his kisses and Roy could only smile secretly as he deepened their kiss.

They were in such an intimate moment when someone chose to barge in right at that moment.

"Nii'san! I was just ---" whatever it was that Alphonse wanted to say was never finished. The next sound that was heard was the contact of metal with the floor.

"Oh damn…" Ed could only mutter in annoyance as he was forced to pull away from the kiss. "Remind me next time to lock the door."

.:OWARI:.

Kaori: finally! It's done and over with…

Edward: why on earth do you keep on pairing me with that bastard!

Kaori: mou… but you two look good together!

Roy: Just tell me if you want to die in flames. I'll be honored to do you a favor

Hughes: Now, now, Roy.. it's time you settle for a long life relationship. Stop blaming it on kaori-chan.

Kaori: arigato, Hughes-san! teary eyes

Roy: glare don't start with me, Maes

Edward: hey! Stop writing fics and finish your projects! You have less than an hour to do so and would you close that damned chatroom? Get some sleep dimwit! You look like hell!

Kaori: gulpnods in compliancescampers off

Roy: you scared him, baka.

Edward: shrugs it's a better way to get rid of her

Roy:smiles mischievouslysay, Ed… wouldn't you want to finish this fic..?

Edward: don't start, Roy. I'll freaking send you in hell along with your flames.

Roy:pout lol.I just have to put this you're cold.

Edward: I'm not cold. I'm HOT, and you perfectly know that.

Roy: how can you even say that? You can't even reach my neck. What a pity.

Edward:glaredo you want to die that badly?

Roy: you love me way too much to get rid of me

Edward: don't be so full of yourself, bastard! And kaori, didn't I tell you to stop writing this fic and go to bed! You freaking have school tomorrow!

Kaori: eep! stops typing I'm going! I'm going! Bye guys! Need to go!

27 02 2006

03:41 AM

Ja! I'm logging off!


End file.
